Effective Youth Ministry

By far the BIGGEST influencers on a teenager’s life is their parents. As a youth worker I realize that I do have influence, but I’m under no preconceived notion that my influence reigns superior to all. The majority of a teen’s life is lived within the framework of FAMILY. I’ve always been a HUGE believer in the idea that an effective youth ministry “partners with parents” in their child’s relationship with Jesus. But “partnering with parents” extends far beyond the immediate child-parent relationship. The scope of “partnering with parents” extends to building healthy marriages, providing resources for parenting, spiritual health, self-care, financial, etc. Why are these things important to effective youth ministry, especially since they involve direct interaction with parents and not students? I’m convinced that healthy families are the most effective environment to disciple students. Healthy marriages in the home will speak louder and have more impact on a teenager’s future relationships than a 5-week youth group series on “Sex and Dating”. Parents who display generosity and giving on a frequent basis will be 100 times more effective in impacting the student’s own generosity in the future than a small group Bible study on “Tithing”. The most effective youth ministry happens in a healthy home environment.

Recently I came across an outstanding FREE resource that helps “partner with parents.” It’s call “HOMEWORD“. I’ve been following it for the past 3 weeks and its content is phenomenal. Created by Dr. Jim Burns its provides information on parenting, marriage, spiritual life, crisis, money, etc, by some of the top Christian family and marriage experts around. You can also subscribe to the articles (what I do) and have them delivered to your email on a weekly basis. The best part is that it is ALL FREE!

Do yourself a favor and BOOKMARK www.homeword.com. Here are a few links to get you started:

• Weekly Culture Brief – A weekly update on youth culture. This week’s articles are interesting, “Facebook Contributing to Divorce” & “For Many Girls, Slimming Down Doesn’t Help Self-Esteem“.
• Email Newsletters – Sign up for daily devotionals, weekly culture briefs, and monthly parenting newsletters.
• Radio Broadcasts – half-hour and one hour radio programs. Recent programs include “Teaching Your Kids the Basics on Dating” & “Help for Parents of Overweight Kids“

Spring 2012 Calendar

Spring is upon us and wanted to give you some important upcoming dates as we finish out the school year and head into summer. As the time approaches we’ll explain each of these in more details.

• March 31-April 7 – OKC Mission Trip (download your prayer guides)…NO youth activities.
• April 8 – Registration for Summer Camp is OPEN. $200 total.
• April – May – FourTwelve – “I’m Graduating, Now What? - Owning your faith post high school.” We’re doing a book study on Daniel. We’ll be looking at how Daniel lived out his faith in a Godless culture as well as spending a week looking at the always-popular “End Times”!
• May 10 – Registration for Summer Camp INCREASES. $225 total.
• May 16 – Small Groups “End of the Year Celebration”
• May 18 – SHOWTIME (Friday) – fundraiser for summer camp
• June 4-8 – VBS
• June 10-15 – Camp Doulos

DNOW 2012 Video Announcement

Just a quick announcement that DNOW is less than 2 weeks away. Go to www.fbc-la.org to grab all the details and registration forms. We have a TON of great stuff planned for the weekend and I can’t wait to see God do some amazing things. I cannot encourage you enough to do everything you can to get your students to attend DNOW weekend.

FourTwelve Review (February 22)

Teaching Series: The Power of Sex – Week 3

Main Idea: Who a Guy Is

Message: This week we looked at ‘who a guy is’. In order to gain some perspective on this we took a good look at some stereotypical differences between guys and girls. Here are a few that we covered:

• Girls are RELATIONAL. Guys are PHYSICAL.
• Girls are VERBAL. Guys are VISUAL.
• Girls love CHIVALRY. Guys like BUDDIES.
• Girls sex drive is SLOW. Guys sex drive is FAST.
• Girls like EXPERIENCES. Guys want to be EXPERIENCED.

The goal of discussing these differences was to try to establish an understanding for how they can impact a relationship. The fact that guys are very visual is not a “bad” or “evil” thing. However if we misunderstand this fact or disregard it, then it has the potential to wreak havoc in our relationships (and beyond). We gave several examples of how misunderstanding these differences can lead us to dangerous situations in our lives. On the flip-side, understanding these differences and responding accordingly can lead amazing God-honoring relationships without the fear of pain, shame, or regret.

The Challenge: There were 3

1. Understand how God views you: You are an ORIGINAL MASTERPIECE! Psalm 139 does an amazing job of how God views you (even if you don’t feel that way about yourself).
2. Honor one another.  If you are a Christian we are called to honor each other and help one another out. Check the questions below to discuss practical ways that your child can accomplish this challenge.
3. Honor God with your body. God paid a HIGH price for our lives. It cost him the life of his only son. THAT’S A BIG DEAL!!! When we live a life of purity its as if we are saying THANK YOU to God.

QUESTIONS FOR CONVERSATION THIS WEEK:

1. Read 1 Corinthians 13:4-7. How do these verses help us understand how we can honor someone of the opposite sex?
2. What would a typical guy say his priorities were in a relationship with a girlfriend?
3. Do those priorities match up with the way Christ says we are to love that person in our lives? Why or why not?

DNOW 2012 – “RESPOND” (March 16-18)

Disciple NOW is HERE!!! Actually its March 16-18 and it’s the BIGGEST event of the year put on by H&M Student Ministries. At Disciple NOW students spend roughly 36 hours of being taught God’s word in large group settings, learning in small groups, worshiping through song, and hanging out with their peers in a positive and fun environment. We also have special guests speakers and worship leaders (this year we’re excited to have former FBCLA interns from years past join us for the weekend). EVERY YEAR we see God do amazing things and see students step up in their faith in Jesus Christ. I cannot encourage you enough to do EVERYTHING YOU CAN to get your child to attend DNOW weekend.

This year’s theme for DNOW is “RESPOND”. Here’s the idea behind “respond”:

GOD LOVES YOU!!!…no doubt you’ve probably heard that before. But what is your RESPONSE to that statement? Some accept it, some reject it, others are indifferent. Regardless we all have some type of RESPONSE. Join H&M Student Ministries for a fun and inspiring weekend as we check out what is means to “RESPOND” to the love of God!

REGISTRATION IS NOW OPEN! Check out the fbc-la.org website for registration documents, schedules and more information. Forms can be turned in any time the youth group is meeting or in the church office during normal business hours.

FourTwelve Review (February 15)

Teaching Series: The Power of Sex – Week 2

Main Idea: What a Girl Wants

Message: This week we had Rita Brake as our guest speaker to give us a woman’s perspective on this hot topic. She stated that while “what a girl wants” will change and look different for everyone, women want to be pursued (something that Jesus provides for each of us). And that pursuit will make a woman feel known, accepted, and respected (deep desires in our hearts, that once again, Jesus provides for each of us).

Favorite Moment: ”Are you dating a chicken nugget?”….Rita explained how chicken nuggets were made (kind of gross) and compared that to a certified USDA steak. The analogy was used to ask the question, “Is what you are pursuing ‘real’?” While it can be argued that chicken nuggets are “real” food and there is no judgement being made about the rightness/wrongness of eating chicken nuggets, its quite obvious to see which selection is preferred. The question to be asked is do you know what you are eating and why you are eating it? And are you OK with that? In terms of sex/dating/relationships (minus the eating), the exact same questions apply. Are you dating without thinking about what you are putting into your body (‘chicken nuggets’) or are you waiting for what God has planned for you (USDA steak)?…What I loved about this moment was observing the reactions by the students over the room. They were repulsed by the process in which chicken nuggets were made and you could see the wheels spinning in their head as Rita made the connection to have them think about their own lives and relationships. It hit the “illustration jackpot”!

QUESTIONS FOR CONVERSATION THIS WEEK:

1. On a scale of 1-10, (10 being extremely uncomfortable) how comfortable are you talking about sex with your parents? With your small group?
2. What is the most difficult aspect for you personally of waiting until marriage to have sex?
3. Do you think God wants to make you miserable by making you wait?

SPRING BREAK MISSION TRIP: Oklahoma City

For Spring Break this year we are going on a mission trip to Oklahoma City. We are partnering with church plant called Crosstown in downtown Oklahoma City. We haven’t gone a mission trip in quite some time as a youth group so I’m extremely excited about this opportunity! An experience like this can be LIFE-CHANGING. Students will be challenged in ways that help them to discover/exercise their gifts and talents. Again, this a unique opportunity for students to server our world unlike anything we’ve been able to offer in recent years, so I would encourage anyone considering going to talk with us to get more details (and soon, because space is limited).

Cost’s are detailed on the FBCLA website and February 29th is the cutoff date for early-bird registration (cost increases by $50 per person). This trip is for High School students and above. Although adults will be going on the trip they will not be expected to be chaperones. One element of this trip that I’m excited about  is the opportunity multiple generations to partner together in a ministry environment.

I can hardly think of a more exciting experience for your child to grow in their relationship with God than to experience a mission trip like this. We look forward to what God will do through our youth group as they minister in Oklahoma City.

FourTwelve Review

Teaching Series: The Power of Sex – Week 1

Main Idea: Distinguishing Truth from Lies

Message: This week we discussed the fact that God created Sex and has a great plan for a wonderful sex life. Quite simply God’s plan for sex is within the context of marriage. However, in today’s world that is not the message being conveyed. The different messages about sex come from every angle and the result is that many people are confused, feel alone, and frightened. Here are the different messages we discussed in the talk at FourTwelve:

SEX MESSAGES FROM THE WORLD’S WAY

• Sex is no BIG DEAL
• Sex is purely PHYSICAL
• God is DOWN on sex
• Everyone is DOING IT
• It’s impossible to be PURE

WHAT YOU DON’T HEAR FROM THE WORLD’S WAY

• Your sexual decisions will leave LIFE-LONG MEMORIES
• Your sexual decisions can have LIFE-LONG CONSEQUENCES
• The best sex lives are found in MARRIAGES WHO WAITED

It was a “deep” message and hopefully challenged your child to think about God’s plan for sex and how that compares to the messages they receive from the world.

QUESTIONS FOR CONVERSATION:

1. What are some examples of the sexual lies you and your friends are exposed to that justify a myriad of sexual sins as being okay or normal?
2. Read 1 Corinthians 6:15-20

• How would you define “sexual immorality”?
• What value does God place on our bodies? How then, should we treat our bodies?
• What is Paul referring to when he says that sex causes two people to become one body?
• Why do you think sexual immorality is a sin against your own body?
• How is sexual immorality different from other sins? (The consequences are so extreme)
• How can we avoid compromises that lead to sexual sin? (v 18)

A Letter to Parents (Upcoming Series at FourTwelve)

Dear Parents,

On Wednesday, February 8th H&M Student Ministries at FBCLA will start a series “The Power of Sex” during FourTwelve (6:00-6:45pm). Sex is powerful, tough to talk about, and often misrepresented. Fortunately God has plenty to say about it.

Below are the topics we’ll be discussing and the schedule in which we’re covering them:

• Feb 8: “The Word on Sex” – What God’s word says and His plan for amazing sex.
• Feb 15: “What a Girl Wants”
• Feb 22: “Who a Guy Is”
• Feb 29: “How Far is too Far?” – Healthy boundaries for dating and relationships.
• March 7: “I’ve Messed Up, Now What?” – Unfortunately this question is a reality that many of our students are facing. We’ll hit it head on.
• March 14: “You Asked for It” – Students ask questions and we answer.

I’m convinced no other subject has teenagers more confused. They’re hit from every side with conflicting messages. In this series, students will probably hear terms like sex, dating, pornography, oral sex, sexting, etc. (we’ll focus on some of these more specifically like sex and dating, while others will be mentioned and discussed further if necessary). Why discuss these sensitive subjects? The answer is because nearly every student is dealing with these issues in some way and many are struggling with it in their personal lives. We do not want to shy away from topics because they are tough to talk about, especially when the consequences are so extreme.

If there is one series at FourTwelve in which I would “require” your student to attend it would be this one. Obviously I can’t make anyone go, but this is an incredible opportunity for each student to openly hear and discuss a topic that rarely gets talked about in a church setting.

If you feel your student is not ready for this content, or if you want to be the one that disciples your student on these issues, I understand. Unfortunately, I do not have any alternatives offered during that time. I just ask, that if you do decide for your student not to participate that you would send me an email (mbrake@fbc-la.org), so I’m not wondering why they are missing.

Our goal is that God is glorified by helping students build a foundation for healthy, God-honoring, relational lives. The best way you can help is to PRAY. Pray for students to honor God in their relationships and for healing and forgiveness to occur where needed.

I’m so thankful for each of you!

Mike Brake

Mission Project: The LifeBook

I believe something HUGE is about to happen in the city of Los Alamos! And it starts with this shipment of 1000+ LifeBooks that just arrived in my office. Why is this HUGE? And what are LifeBooks? Well I’m glad you asked! Essentially, LifeBooks are the Gospel of John and are designed to be handed out to teenagers. Founded by the Gideons International, the goal of LifeBook movement is to “saturate” the high schools in the United States with the Gospel of John.

The reason I believe this is huge is that I believe this is a God-sized mission in order to hand out over 1000 of these books. In my mind, it seems impossible. What gets me excited are the possibilities found in what God would do if 1000+ students in Los Alamos received one of these books! Would some of them read it? I think so! Would God speak to some of them and save their lives? I think so!!! Is it crazy to think that a little book can have a big impact in Los Alamos? I believe that God can save many lives through the simple gesture of a free book, ESPECIALLY when the book contains His Word! So here is the plan (0r at least part of it):

• One of the best parts of the mission is that it is FREE! We paid for the cost of shipping & everything else was covered by the Gideons International.
• In the next few weeks, I will be organizing a plan with students in the youth group and other youth ministries in  town on when and how all this will go down.
• We will train everyone with what they need to know and do for distributing these books.
• We all need to start PRAYING for God to bless this local mission trip.
• As we determine more specific information, I will get you the details.
• Check out www.thelifebook.com from more information.
• Or read the LifeBook for yourself!